Whether we are willing to accept it or not, we see divorce as a bruise and a blemish on the church, even on those who are not at fault. But, being divorced isn’t the only “failure” that makes Christians uncomfortable. Do not (and I emphasize, DO NOT!!!) allow your spouse to die at a young age either. As a matter of fact, don’t wait too long to get married either! Singleness makes Christians uncomfortable.
There is a conception that single people are always unhappy, are irresponsible, unreliable and are missing out on the fullness of life. Some get the sense that they are invisible. Many are seen as lacking, less than or not whole. Many church members dismiss the single and many forget their singleness as soon as they are married. Others are not invited to activities because they are not married.
I have heard many elders and ministers “joke” about the “singles, singles again (and again) and the singles FOR A REASON”. Many singles have been told that they don’t “deserve” to be married or that marriage must not be “meant for you”. Yet, the same leaders would marry again quickly if the circumstances were theirs.
Remember that all marriages do eventually end, even if death occurs. Many a single dad or mom at church is widowed. Many are divorced due to the actions of an unfaithful spouse. Many good couples meet in Christian colleges and divorce struggling with the real world. Some make responsible choices and do NOT marry the wrong person and yet are penalized and stigmatized as being not married “for a reason”.
Singles, remember that you always belong to Jesus Christ and are always loved. Your life can be very rich and fulfilling as a single. You are forced to let go of the temporary but allowed to embrace the eternal.
Leaders, you are missing out on fellowship with many kind, passionate, dedicated and loving individuals. Single “for a reason”? Always! Jesus was “single for a reason”. How about Paul? Timothy? When did David do his greatest work? Joseph? Single “for a reason”? Yes, single to glorify Jesus.